April 28th, 2011

    Basketball and her mind-holding smell. The gentle touch and the passion between us. I have to say, today is one of the best days in my life. So many things happened yet I only remember the time that I spent with her. I would spend the rest of my life with her even if I have to give up everything that I have right now. She has become the center of my life and I can no longer take my eyes off of her. I love her and I love her a lot. Stay with me and never let me go. This is a really long day for me because I really miss the time we spent together. I hope she feels the same.

April 27th, 2011

    Nothing much happened today. We had a game and I had an argument with her. It wasn't a good day for me today. I started the day off half asleep and I failed my AP English unit exam. The structure of the essay was horrible and the questioned was not answered. I hope I can survive through this test. I don't want my AP English grade to drop. The game was horrible. We lost terribly and we lost because we had no determination to win. The results of the game destroyed our will to continue playing, but I really do want to win. We have to win the game we have next week. We cannot afford to lose again. We went into an argument but we soon solved everything. I hope our relationship doesn't change because of this.

April 26th, 2011

    I'm getting really annoyed at how things are becoming right now. We have to go to so many classes and there are so many things that we have to do in order to catch up with all of our work. The AP exams are pressing us and we don't have much time left. I really don't know how I should face the exams and face the whole pile of things that are coming up, but I know that we will be together and support each other through. I have to go to bed now. I have a basketball game I have to deal with tomorrow. I need rest and I need her support.

April 25th, 2011

    I'm tired!!!! I can't believe that practice today can be this tiring. My legs are sore, my arms are pulled, and I'm having a headache. I want to go to bed right now but I have so much homework that I have to make up and I have to do. I have so much psychology notes that I have to do and I also have so many European history notes that I have to complete. I need to work really hard. I'm also facing some trouble with Calculus. I haven't handed in my homework since the third quarter yet I lied to my mom. Now my mom wants me to get a note saying that I did all my homework. This is really troublesome and I don't want to deal with this issue at all.

April 24th, 2011

    Nothing much happened today and I don't know what else I can do. I have so much homework and the AP Exams are coming up very soon. Despite so many things that are pressing on me, I still don't want to do anything and I don't even care about the exams. There must be something wrong in my mind. I don't want to do any prep-work and I don't want to study anything. I have three exams that I have to prepare for and I know I can do really well in one of them, but I don't know what I will do for the other two exams. No matter how I try, I just don't understand why I can't focus. It's not because of her, it's me that is the problem.

April 21st, 2011

    Disappointment, anger, and regret rushed into me when the game ended today. We lost again and we lost because of many stupid reasons that shouldn't have occurred. People were not willing to play and we made several stupid mistakes during the game. We had the energy and the will, but we didn't have our minds ready to think and do what is best for us all. We lost by three points and I really regret not being able to change the situation during the overtime. What was lost was lost. All I have to do now is get ready for our next game. I really don't know what I could do, but I know that I will keep playing. I will keep playing just because she is there to support me. I love here and I know that she will always be there. Thank you a lot and I want you to know I will love you forever.

April 20th, 2011

    Today was full of weird dreams because most of my time today was spent sleeping, whether I was in class or not. I slept through government, English, psychology, and even my study hall. I'm really tired this week and I don't know why. I have basketball game tomorrow and I really need to win this game. I cannot let my team down again. I don't want to go to class tomorrow. All I want to do is sleep, relax my body, and win the game. I need her support and I need her to be with me before the game so that I can get ready mentally.

April 19th, 2011

    Classes have not been going to well today because I am exhausted today and I didn't have the spirit to do anything. I'm also very mad at how things are going. Today was supposed to be a perfect day, but now everything is messed up. I understand why you don't want me to get too close to you during school hours, but I do not understand why I can't even be with you after school. I'm really upset. It's not me that you should be worried about. If you have something that you don't like or you don't want me to do, just tell me. Why find other reasons to push me away and why feel guilt about rejecting me? I don't understand. I really don't.

April 18th, 2011

    Today is as horrible as it can be and there is nobody I can blame for this horrible day. Shit is happening all around me and there is nothing I can do about it. I got so mad today that I just went out of school and drank for the day. I did really bad in basketball practice today because I was drunk most of the time. Why does fate always have to play a hand on us? Why does it have to be us that destiny picks on? I ask these questions over and over again yet I still don't have an answer. I'm doing pretty well in all of my classes, but she is not doing very well. Even Miss Pamela came to find me and talk to me about her situation. Things are going too well and I really don't like how things are. I want to be with her forever.

April 17th, 2011

    What a relaxing weekend with so much homework. Well, it is a relaxing weekend because I didn't do any of the work I was supposed to do. Things are going very well for me because I'm tired and I don't want to do anything at all while there are so many things that are awaiting me. I just want to stay with her. I want to spend all of my time with her. I can't find anything that can cause me to raise my interest anymore. This may sound irresponsible, but I need school work to be more interesting than other things such as basketball. Nothing can be more interesting than her, well, that has to be true after all. My brain is not functioning properly right now. I better go study for my tests tomorrow.

April 14th, 2011

    Today was awfully exhausting. I've played basketball for three hours straight today and I'm really tired. I've injured so many places today that I hope that I could just fall down and die. I've injured my ankle, my legs, my knees, my back, and my lungs today. I can't breath properly and I can't walk properly. I have so much shit that I have to do tomorrow that I can't go to sleep to night. I got to finish some AP Calculus shit and I have to prepare for a unit exam for AP European history. There are also three units of notes that I have to complete before I can get myself ready for the test and that I have to hand in. I don't want to go to practice tomorrow. I want to be with her. I want to spend more time with her.

April 13th, 2011

    Today wasn't as well as I thought it would be. I was so tired and couldn't keep my mind awake when I was doing anything today. I was almost completely out of conscious during English class and I almost fell asleep during psychology class. It was a really painful day and I wasn't in a good mood for most of the day. I didn't spend any time with her today and I fell absolutely awful. I hate it when it comes to be the fact that we have no time together and we can't do anything together. I really hoped for our situation to change, but nothing seems to be able to change it. Today's basketball practice was exhausting. I'm never going to be that tired again.

April 12th, 2011

    Things are getting easier for me right now. I have finished all of the midterms and most of my grades have stabilized. I think my grades won't be too bad and I believe I can safely graduate from high school right now. I have a few more unit tests coming up recently and I will be facing my AP Exams pretty soon. I hope everything works out for me. The senior class took our graduation photos today and we went out of school for some fun. I also spent some time with her this afternoon and I really loved it. I should be more careful and gentle next time because I'm afraid I'll hurt her. Basketball practice? Mayb.

April 11th, 2011

    I don't know why I feel this way, but I'm really tired and I really hate what life is doing to us. We never get a chance to be alone because there is always something that would intervene between us. It is either some unexpected event or somebody that just has nothing to do. I hate life and I hate destiny for not letting us spend more time with each other, but I thank them for letting us be together. I need her and I really love her a lot. I hate it when somebody says that she will give up anything about something and then intervenes into the thing again. The first day of school was quite different from what I had expected, but things are still going well. I want to spend more time with her, a lot more time.

April 10th, 2011

    Things are not going well for me at all. I've just lost my chance to go to university in the United States. My mom was very upset about my score on unit tests in school and she said I didn't deserve to go to college. I know I didn't study much during this time and I know I had a bad study attitude, so I think I deserve what I get. Maybe things have changed for me, but I know that we will still be together forever. I finally completed all of my midterms today and I am really happy about it. I think I did really well on the tests and I believe that I can raise my grades. I really hope that I can get Bs on all of my classes. I need those Bs and I want to keep my grades as they were before. I need to prove my mother wrong. I can do well.

April 7th, 2011

    Today was a complete change for me. I have finally started doing some of the homework I have and I have finished studying for my AP Psychology midterm. I feel pretty happy about this and I don't want to slack off anymore. I've done pretty well on my psychology tests, at least better than the other two subjects that I have to take during the break. I feel dissappointed at myself for slacking off so much during all this time and I really want to make it all up. Things are going well between us, but I'm keeping her up really, really late. I don't like that at all. I want her to take of herself more and I want her to be happy. I swear I won't let her down. Not once in my life again.

April 6th, 2011

    I'm starting to worry right now. I haven't done any homework and I haven't studied for any of my tests during the whole break. I starting to worry that I won't get good grades on the midterms and that I will fail all of my classes. I really need to study for the following two days so that I can safely graduate from high school and not mess up my life. I spent a pretty good afternoon with her today and we discussed lots of things together I really want to be with her for the rest of my life. I love her and I will love her forever. She really needs to get more rest and get more sleep. She is making me really worried.

April 5th, 2011

     Today was strange. I was not a disappointment to my parents, but to my family. Today was tomb sweeping day for my family, but I didn't show up and I didn't go to the family dining period. I think I was completely horrible today. I really need to get up earlier, study harder, and complete what I have missed in previous classes. I completely missed out time spent with her today and I've kept her waiting again. I really need to improve and become a better man. I love her so much and I don't want her to suffer for me. This is just not correct.

April 4th, 2011

    Things aren't going too well today. I still haven't done any studying and I really don't know if this is good. I have so much I have to do over this break and I have achieved so little it is pathetic. I really need to work harder and get off the addiction on things that I shouldn't be addicted on. This would make my life much easier and my parents would be way happier then they are now. I hope I could be a better child, but it seems like I always disappoint my parents one way or another. I hope I can graduate from university without having them worry about me too much. I hope I can take her as my wife, just like we said. I love her very, very much and I will love her for the rest of my life.

April 3rd, 2011

    This vacation is pretty dull and there is really nothing that can be done about it. All that I can do in this break is prepare for college, prepare for my midterms, and prepare for the AP exams that are coming up. There is so much academic material that I have to cover and there is such little time for me to completely study all of them. I want to spend more time with her and I really want to be with her every moment of my life. It seems I don't have much time to spend with her during this vacation. She is uncomfortable and her parents won't allow her to go out anyways. I hope she feels better. I'm really, really worried about her and I can't think about anything else.